Language Selection

English French German Italian Portuguese Spanish

Secret Future Ubuntu User Interface Plans Revealed!

Filed under
Humor

Recently, a really, really long discussion took place on Launchpad, Ubuntu's bug-tracking system, about the Ubuntu user interface design team's sudden and controversial decision to move window buttons from the right-hand side to the left. It's been widely reported that Mark Shuttleworth, Ubuntu's "SABDFL" (a South African word which roughly translates in English to "BADASS"), announced in response to numerous complaints that "Ubuntu is not a democracy."

Mr. Shuttleworth also said that "moving everything to the left opens up the space on the right nicely,and I would like to experiment in 10.10 with some innovative options there. It's much easier to do that if we make this change now."

But what "innovative options" might he be referring to?

To find out, we contacted Ubuntu's NADOPR (North American Director of Public Relations), Bea Esser, for clarification. Ms. Esser put us in contact with a member of Ubuntu's design team, Drew A. Gooey-Aubergine, who gave us an exclusive look at what innovative new features Ubuntu users might see on the right-hand side of their windows in future releases.

 

For example, there might be an implementation of a boss key by means of the face icon in the upper right-hand corner. In this use-case scenario, explained Mr. Gooey-Aubergine, when you clicked the icon your screen would immediately display the following:

"There's nothing that will convince your boss you're working," explained Mr. Gooey-Aubergine, "like the familiar sight of a real operating system like Windows XP."

 

According to Mr. Gooey-Aubergine, Mark Shuttleworth has been asking all Ubuntu teams to come up with possible ways to increase revenue. "That's a real natural for us, as opposed to, say, those eggheads in the kernel team," said Mr. Gooey-Aubergine. "We've been expecting this request for a long time now."

One possible way would be through a PayPal link.

 

And there's the tried-and-true Google Ads. "These would only be displayed if there was an active Internet connection," explained Mr. Gooey-Aubergine, "making these double as a sort of Network Monitor."

 

Finally, Mr. Gooey-Aubergine seemed to be the most excited about the possibility of adding an Ubuntu Menu. "Think of all the things we could do with that!" he exclaimed. "We could be the first Linux distribution bundled with a one-click "Upgrade to Debian" feature! Although," he admitted, "we haven't passed that one by Mark yet." Nor. as it turned out, had he asked Mr. Shuttleworth about the "uninstall" option.

We'll have more reporting on this exciting story as it develops. In the meantime, what would you want to see in an Ubuntu window? Feel free to add your comments!

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.

Ubuntu has lost touch with reality and is dying

Great satire piece - and as with great satire, there are many grains of truth. And some of your "suggestions" could turn into really useful ideas.

That said, I have been saddened by Ubuntu for the past two releases...and the silliness being displayed by the leadership on this design issue makes me fear for the development of this project. Having used both eeebuntu (EB3) and Ubuntu Eee (easy peasy), I am very excited about eebuntu's move to debian. Ubuntu is getting too large for its own britches...and I truly hope the new version is amazing...but I won't hold my breath.

Haha..I do like the article,

Haha..I do like the article, thanks for that.

However I have to disagree with the poster above. I don't think that Ubuntu has lost touch with reality, I think it's the users and critics that have. The fact is, Ubuntu is NOT democracy, nor' are they bound to the terms/standards handed out by users. Granted, it's nice to listen to the people, and consider their suggestions-- but the fact is, they have to make their own choices. As said by Shuttleworth himself, they are not a democracy..and it's all very true. They've never been a democracy, and they never will be. This goes for all companies..including Novel, KDE, etc. You can't just put out an idea and expect it to always be implemented. It doesn't work that way..unless you own YOUR own company.

I also think, however..that people are seriously over-reacting to the button placing. Who's to say it will be permanent? Maybe they simply want to try it out? Give it a chance maybe? I mean seriously..calm down people Big Grin..and if it doesn't work to your liking, and it sucks..and they fail to listen to everyone in the future..move on.

It's Open Source, If You Recall...

Just change the buttons back yourself. See here: www.howtogeek.com/howto/13535/move-window-buttons-back-to-the-right-in-ubuntu-10.04/

Many a true word spoken in jest...

The notion that good ole 'Bunty may someday become adware - carrying Google adds or links to PayPal - is utterly horrific! Methinks I will be joining lots of folks and hitting the mythical "Upgrade to Debian" button if that ever comes to pass. lol. Big Grin

Alternatively, "sudo apt-get install adblock-for-ubuntu" anyone? Devil

More in Tux Machines

KaOS ISO 2014.12

KaOS is very proud to announce the availability of the December release of a new stable ISO. This ISO marks two major milestones for this distribution. Since it’s inception almost two years ago, a need to be ready for UEFI installs has always been a priority. That was tied though to getting a modern Qt based installer that could handle such UEFI installs. With this ISO, both are implemented. Read more

Old FOSS Friend & Foe Represents Sony in Hack

Boies, along with three attorneys representing the States, brought Microsoft to it’s knees — or so it seemed at the time. On November 5, 1999, Judge Thomas Penfield Jackson found that Windows dominance on the PC made the company a monopoly and that the company had taken illegal actions against Apple, Java, Netscape, Lotus Notes, RealNetworks, Linux, and others in order to maintain that monopoly. He ordered Microsoft broken in two, with one company producing Windows and another handling all other Microsoft software. As we all know, Judge Jackson’s solution was never implemented. Although an appeals court upheld the verdict against Redmond, the breakup of the company was overturned and sent back to the lower court for a review by a new judge. Two years later, in September, 2001, under the Bush Administration, the DOJ announced that it was no longer seeking the breakup of Microsoft, and in November reached a settlement which California, Connecticut, Iowa, Florida, Kansas, Minnesota, Utah, Virginia and Massachusetts opposed. The settlement basically required Microsoft to share its APIs and appoint a three person panel that would have complete access to Microsoft’s systems, records, and source code for five years. The settlement didn’t require Microsoft to change any code or stop the company from tying additional software with Windows. Additionally, the DOJ did not require Microsoft to change any of its code. Read more

Study: ‘European Parliament should use open source’

The European Parliament should use free software and open standards for all of its ICT systems and data, concludes a study by the EP’s Greens/European Free Alliance: “That is the most appropriate way for the Parliament to meet its own standard of ‘utmost transparency’.” Read more

Fedora 21 review - Uh, not again

Why did Fedora 21 have to be so buggy? Why? I wanted it to succeed, I wanted it to be cool and fun, just like the last release. There was so much potential, and then, something went wrong. Quite a few somethings, apparently. Installer partition selections, bootloader, login, codecs, printing, desktop effects. Damn. Fedora, where art thou? Anyhow, Fedora 21 KDE is just not as good as it should be. Not as good as its predecessor, not as good as its rival, and most importantly, not as good as Fedora. There must be a baseline to quality, and it must never be crossed, downwards. This time, I did not get what I wanted, and I'm sad, because I know that Fedora can do it. We've all seen it happen. So more time is needed in the special oven for naughty distros. Perhaps I rushed testing just days after the official release, but it is how it is. 6/10. Done. Read more Also: Fedora 21 GNOME Review: If you can ignore the initial hiccups, fantastic operating system!