Language Selection

English French German Italian Portuguese Spanish

Apple + Intel = M$ Conspiracy Theory

Filed under
Humor

Shouting "I told you so!" and "The end is near!", staff members of the Humorix Vast Conspiracy Theory Research Division were shocked and appalled by the news that Apple is going to start shacking up with Intel.

The "Inpple" development fits perfectly with our Microsoft Conspiracy Theory #36,712,380, the most sinister conspiracy theory ever devised by Humorix that hasn't been discredited within five minutes. Ever since Microsoft invested $250 million in Apple in 1997, the company that wants you to "Think Different" has been thinking more and more along the same old lines as Microsoft.

"It's all fitting into place," said Mennon Black, head conspiriologist. "With Apple joining Intel, and Sun laying down arms against Microsoft, the vastly inferior Wintel world has just achieved total world domination. I knew this was going to happen."

It should come as no surprise that the unholy alliance of Apple's Reality Distortion Field and Intel's Stupid Four-Bar Jingle Inside will provide a win-win situation for Microsoft. For those brave souls that decide to try Mac OS X-86 Edition, they can always wipe the hard drive and install Windows if they don't like Apple's operating system.

Meanwhile, Microsoft can cut costs by getting rid of its "problem customers" that are always pestering tech support with their petty complaints about corrupted registries or spyware programs that distribute child porn. Now these customers will be shunted to Intel-based Macs, but they will still buy plenty of other Microsoft products that will be readily available for X-86.

Either way, Microsoft wins.

Full Article.

More in Tux Machines

Will There Ever Be Another Red Hat?

Will there ever be another Red Hat? It depends on what you are asking. If the question is will there be other companies that go public based on a model of using open source to power an enterprise software offering, the answer is clearly yes. Hortonworks just did so and the IPO pipeline is likely to include companies like Cloudera, MapR, Talend, and a few others in the near future. But that’s not the most interesting way to understand this question. The better angle is this: Will there be another company that becomes a successful business based on the same or similar model as Red Hat? For the fiscal year ending in February 2015, Red Hat has annual revenues of $1.79 billion and is a profitable company. Will any company ever get to $1 billion or even $500 million in revenue from open source subscriptions and have a chance of being profitable? Read more

Open source threat model aims to make enterprise safer with less work

An open source threat model is aiming to be a repository for risk assessment with the aim of allowing enterprise to focus on creating the right security controls for each business. Read more

Deepin 2014.3 Is a Top Contender for the Most Beautiful OS in the World

deepin, a Linux distribution the offers users with a unique, stable, fast, safe, and user-friendly desktop experience based on the latest HTML5 technologies, has been upgraded to version 2014.3 and numerous improvements have been made. Read more

CUDA in Fedora

  • CUDA enabled programs
    There is a new repository available with CUDA enabled programs in package format. This contains programs that have been linked to CUDA libraries or have CUDA support enabled. At the moment this is available only on Fedora 21, if there is sufficient feedback I will enable it also for other distributions.
  • Making It Easier To Deploy CUDA On Fedora
    While Fedora 21 ships with decent OpenCL support, if you're running the binary NVIDIA graphics driver on Fedora Linux and wishing to use CUDA-accelerated programs, it's a little bit easier today thanks to a new third-party package repository.